Tuesday, January 31, 2006

The attack of the black...thong?

Yes the title is correct. The boss lady's friend called and told of this happening and it was quite humorous so this Imp decided she must tell but in a story fashion, changing the names and minute details as to protect the innocent.....or the not so innocent!



The Attack of the Black Thong
It seemed like an ordinary Monday, everyone dragging into the office wishing it were still Saturday and another day of freedom could be enjoyed. Darcy entered her office, placed her briefcase on the desk, and plopped into her chair as she waited for her computer to boot. "Now that it is Wednesday, stupid computer..." she muttered as her computer finally managed to dredge itself from its weekend slumber to reveal the icons of doom in the shape of "my computer", "outlook", "excel", and "recycle bin". She set about working on reading through e-mails and sorting problems for the next hour, only disturbed by the phone ringing now and again. She decided to take a break and go get a Mr. Pibb from the break room. Pushing her chair back she crossed her office and stepped from the room only to recoil in reflex and shock. What was that thing?
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Back to our story:
At first glance she had thought it was a large rodent or insect but better focus had made her realize it was much worse. Not two feet from her door, sprawled in an obscene nature, was a creature of scanty proportions, an unmentionable of the most extreme.... it was a black thong! How in the world had a black thong come to be outside her office door? She quickly scanned her weekend to make sure she had not had any moments when she would have had a black thong in her purse that might have fallen out. Wait a minute, she didn't own a black thong! what was she thinking? It had to be from the shock of discovering such an item outside her office door. Break room and drink forgotten, she rushed quickly back to her phone and dialed the one person she knew to which it belonged.
Meanwhile in the other office:
Marsha was staring at the blank screen wondering why it had to be Monday again. She sat up suddenly and yanked open her drawer, fishing through for change as she decided to go get some caffeine that was highly needed already this morning. Her cubemate Jamie, or cellmate as they joked at times, glanced over from the TPS reports she was busily preparing. "Needing caffeine already? Well you made it an hour before caving. Can ya grab me a coke?" Marsha nodded and then grabbed extra change. "Coke's on me. Oh by the way...did you get the memo on those TPS reports?" Jamie growled and picked up a stack of papers. "Five times!" Marsha grinned and winked. "I know was just making sure." She dodged out of the cubicle before Jamie could throw anything at her.
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Back to our story:
She spoke to a few people on her way to and from the break room, asking how their weekend was and agreeing it was much too short. Jamie grabbed the coke from her upon her return and pointed to her phone. "Please call Darcy! She has called at least six times in the five minutes you have been gone. " Trying not to roll her eyes, Marsha placed her own coke on her desk and sat down. Dialing Darcy's number, she pondered what could be so important this early on a Monday.
"Darcy, hey its Marsha. Jamie said you ca...What?" She choked as she listened to Darcy. Jamie glanced over and Marsha lifted an eyebrow. "Darcy I have no idea what you are talking about. Fine I will be right there." Hanging up the phone she looked at Jamie with a dumbfounded expression. "What did she say?" Jamie asked warily. "Darcy just told me to come get my black thong off the floor!" Jamie's jaw dropped. "What?"
to be continued....

3 comments:

TJ said...

intriguing. i can't wait to find out what happens.

David said...

Ok, as a guy, this title got my attention quick. LOL. No, really I just can't wait to read the rest either.

Breazy said...

Can't wait for the next part ! hehe