Friday, November 25, 2005

D-Day!


D-day has arrived! That day that sends the tempo, that has been building slowly before this, into the next phase...the chaotic, man-slaughtering tempo that will start in a mad rush today and build to its climax on Christmas Eve! Starting today...the biggest shopping day of the year for Americans...usually congenial people will turn into hand-biting, teeth gnashing, hair pulling, gift grubbers who will use any means necessary to get that perfect gift for their loved ones! A mother bear protecting her young is more docile then these shoppers! Children will be heard crying in stereo as they whine to see Santa as their mothers stare another mother down for the pink sweater that is 70% off today and today only! (Though it will be on sale next week as well without the jacked up original price) Husbands will groan as their wives quote the "Just one more store" saying for the fifth time. Teenagers who are out of school for the overlooked T-day holiday will push and poke through crowds without even an "excuse me", showing the severe lack of discipline and manners our society has these days, whilst laughing and yelling out inane or crude jokes to friends who are also pushing over the elderly to be on their way!
Clerks and Retail workers will smile and say "Happy Holidays" while underneath giving terrible names to the customers who are trashing the store in their quest for the best bargain with no heed that someone will have to clean it up (the workers) later before they are allowed to go home and rest weary feet and weary cheeks from smiling at the rude crowds! ( This Imp worked retail for 3 years...is very thankful for the box job today!)
All of this to what gain? NOTHING! Sweaters that the receiver will hate, neckties that will get lost among the shoes in the bottom of the closet, gizmos and gadgets that will be played with, tinkered with, and toyed with for once maybe twice then discarded in boredom! Now don't get me wrong, this Imp loves to give gifts....tis just the frenzy and chaos that this day incites that this Imp loathes!
Worst of all...a battle was lost yesterday in a momentary weakness of this Imp...whilst this Imp was relaxing in a well fed state after the T-day feast, the aunt and cousins mentioned shopping...well today's adventure was easily turned down because of work, but then as this Imp was somewhat dozing in a state of content...Saturday shopping was mentioned....and behold Froofroo surfaced! This my friends and fellow readers...is multiple personality # 2: Froofroo...the girly girl who loves to shop, loves chick flicks, and loves to look all cute....the other personalities try to keep her under wraps quite often but once in a while she pushes through and yesterday she did just that! This Imp found herself saying "I would luv to go with you on Saturday." WHAT?? ARE YOU CRAZY!! SHOPPING...ON THE WEEKEND AFTER THANKSGIVING?? the other personalities yelled...but alas it was too late!
Soooooooooooooo my friends, this Imp is going shopping in the morning and Froofroo is very excited whilst the other personalities are very very unhappy.

Le Sigh.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

At least you avoided the possibility of mace, stampede, and fistacuffs for a $340 Laptop? or a Bratz baby. Oh please someone also explain why a bratz baby is good???

Anonymous said...

Hello, my tempermentally conflicted friend...
I hope your froofroo self has enjoyed the fun of communing with the vast herds of shoppers who're grazing the local retail pastures even now, having been lured by the prospect of consuming the lush green contents of thier bank accts.???
All is well??? I miss hearing from your vivacious, outgoing, AND fun self(selves?)...loved your "Inner Battle" posting.
And could expound at length on the annoying missaplication, and double standards of "Tolerance"(and other PC concepts imposed on all, by the "liberal" left)...Example: "Don't impose your judgemental right wing values on me! Keep your laws off my body!!! Oh, bye the way, I forbid you to smoke that cigarette...THAT would be WRONG, and BAD FOR YOU!!!"
Must...stop before ranting...takes on...life of...it's...own...Aaargh!
Anyway...enjoyed catching up on your thoughts...as stated in other contexts, "you ARE quite adorable on occasion(often, actually)"
Keep being just who you are, you're lovely right now. No changes(or unnatural restraint on verbosity)needed... :-)
-Bob K.