Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Public Bathrooms

I loathe public bathrooms.

Putting aside the germs part, the thing that bothers me the most is the noises. Yes I said the noises. I know everyone makes them but I am sorry I don't want anyone to hear my noises or to hear someone else's noises.

Why you might ask? It is a natural thing for people to make noises whilst going to the bathroom. Well because I pay too much attention because I am just an observant person and my observant nature added to my imaginative mind is not a good combo in the bathroom. Take for instance yesterday at work:

At some point in the afternoon I felt nature's call so I begrudgingly left my oh so exciting accounting work and headed for the ladies room. I am one of those that even if I was about to explode I would take time to put paper down so I don't get butt germs....yes I said butt germs.

So back to the story: Once I was settled and ready to do my business I hear another woman....well I am assuming it was a woman....all I actually saw were shoes...ok now this story has a whole other twist. Ok for the sake of simplicity we will assume that only women come into the bathroom at work so therefore this was a woman and she entered the stall next to me.

Ok first:
There are three stalls in this bathroom, this woman should have known the unspoken rule of leaving the obligatory stall empty between us.

But no she chose the one right next to mine. Then proceeded to pee a marathon!

Like I said my observant nature and overactive mind are not a good combo at times like these because I started giggling because the woman must be all bladder! I had to cover my mouth with my hand because it was like one of those cartoons where the crazy character is doing something and it starts to act like it is going to stop only to start back up again.

I wonder if she was abit shriveled when she left....or abit dehydrated....Do you see what I mean about overactive imagination.

So here I the bathroom....giggling at the woman in the stall next to me. I don't think I have ever had to exit a bathroom so quickly in my life. I was so terrified she would hear me giggling. I flushed glad for the noise. I washed my hands glad for the noise. The whole time giggling!

I think I will start taking my Ipod into the bathroom with me....hmmmm


lime said...

in japan they have these little doohickeys installed in the public loos. you can press them and they make sounds (music of nature sounds or something) to cover the other 'natural' sounds that occur.

Breazy said...

I hope you have a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!


Nicki said...

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